chill. have fun.

Lots of realizations this week. Too personal to blast on the information super highway, but the last few months of healing were merely prep for the major soul searching epiphanies that are happening now. I am going to be SO good. Maybe not for awhile, but it's all going to get better from here. A couple of details of my week- anyone who knows me will understand the revolution that is happening... i went to 2 shows this week. Because I WANTED to...Enjoyed both. Danced all night at one. On a school night. Very small amount of drinking, just mainly good times with friends. 

Things that made me feel good yesterday:

1. Stumbled upon a dodgeball game in the park by my house at 10pm last night with J. It was a scheduled game, with hundreds of Jr. High and High School kids. Amazing. 

2. I received a letter in the mail that looked like a wedding invite. I opened it, annoyed. It turned out to be a very thoughtful and uplifting note from my sis in law. It turned my night around. thanks M. 

3. I realized that for almost a year my dry erase board in my office at work has only had one message on it. I don't know who wrote it, or when, but it makes me smile everyday. (you will probably have to click in it to read- i shot the photo in the wrong format and this dumb layout cuts a third of landscape photos out)

it's all about the moment i am in. and the people that i surround myself with. and it's about letting more of them in. 

time to begin

red shoes. unicorns.

My horoscope for this week:
Scorpio: the three tasks i think you should work on in the coming week are among the hardest any human being can attempt. Luckily you now have an unusually strong aptitude for them and are likely to receive unexpected assistance if you are brave enough to plunge ahead. Here they are: (1) Interrupt and overthrow negative trains of thought right in the middle of their flow through your brain. (2) Negotiate partial solutions to complex problems. In other words, do the half right thing when it is impossible to do the totally right thing. (3)Understand that in order to graduate from a certain batch of weird karma that has persisted, you must accept the situation as it it, acknowledge your role in precipitating and prolonging it, and feel gratitude for all it has taught you.

damn. good advice.

and now: red shoes and unicorns! red shoes, i promise to never throw you away until you fall off my feet.

mambo sun

I may be stating the obvious here. But I am never happier than when I am in sunshine. It warms my skin, and somehow fills up my heart to the top. The smell of sun stays in my hair long into the night. No wonder Seattle and I don't get along most of the year. But spring, wonderful, happy, beautiful spring showed up this weekend and I hope it is here to stay. Even on a Monday with a groggy, slightly hungover head, walking out into the sunlight made me smile and not stop smiling, through conference call after touchbase after conference call. I worked through lunch so I could leave a few minutes early and go lay in the park. i was not the only one with that idea.

Then I took a stroll through the alley near my house, I've photographed this alley before, but it was interesting the different things I was able to see in a different season, with a different viewpoint. I just went through my blog archives and realized I will be celebrating a year of random documentation on 4/23. I made it another year in seattle. Don't let that sun fool you, S. It will leave you with the summer!

oh and the girl with the bicycle- if it makes it less creepy, I actually know her.

Panamania

VACATION IS FINALLY PLANNED. APPROVED. WILL BE BOOKED BY MONDAY. thank GOD. In less than 4 weeks I will be on a beach in Panama with two of my best friends in the world. 

So now comes the task of finding my outfitting inspiration for the trip. Last trip was tropical glam in the Caribbean. gold accessories galore. I think this year I will continue going forward with the West coast Golden Child theme that i have been developing. Think California in the 70's. It needs to be more defined though...

vintage sundresses. long ones. wait, maybe kaftans too...yes definitely kaftans. 

high waist shorts. peasant tops. 

hippy hair- braided, wavy, pinned back, loose.

long necklaces. wood detail accessories.

sandals of course. 

swimwear poses a problem because last years suit really only fits with trop glam. I have to make it work though because I can't buy a new suit. Truth be told I bought 2 new suits last year...

NOW if there is anyway we can stay in some sort of treehouse on the beach, everything will be complete.

delirium

i am home all week working on writing reviews for my people at work. Working from home sounds nice, but the amount of work i got done today was miniscule. I kept getting distracted, thinking if i moved rooms i would be able to concentrate, kept having technical problems, etc. Didn't get out of bed (have laptop) until about 10:30 and then didn't get dressed until noon at which point I actually put on a dress and tights and then proceeded to sit on the couch and try to work for 4 hours. I don't know why i didn't accept the reality that it didn't matter what i put on... i knew i wasn't leaving the house. 

I've been feeling under the weather this week, so i have been taking it easy anyway, but i just had a thought that makes me feel like maybe i have a temperature. I just imagined if we were actually paid by the hour. Like if there was a little man who sat and handed over $20 (or whatever an hourly rate looks like these days) every hour. and then you took your twenty, folded it neatly, put it in your pocket, maybe said "thank you" and then continued typing. but then THAT means that the little man would have his OWN little man paying HIM by the hour and so on and so forth. oh man. it's so dumb that it made me laugh for ever. It has to be a little man or otherwise it's not funny. I also imagine a little curtsy happening when you accept the money... anyway, delirium, back to work. 

manifesto by request (more to add later)

by iviewfromthetop.blogspot.com
manifesto from friend of one million years. thanks L. this is amazing. 

clear
calm
free
live in moment
future no fear
cherish family and friends
love thy self most
laugh like no tomorrow
travel to unfamiliar places
enjoy returning too...
take care of body
body take care of you
don't forget coffee in the morning
and favorite things....
"may the longtime sunshine upon you
all love surround you
and the pure light within you
guide your way home" -unkown